Let me state this from the outset. Let me be absolutely clear. I am not cool.
Pretty much everything about me is not cool. The way I look. The way I dress. The way I style my hair. The way I talk.
The music I like was largely recorded twenty or more years ago. I have little interest in following the latest films or TV shows. And I pay no attention to any trends in food or design or any other aspects of lifestyle (whatever that is).
No, there’s no doubt about it. I’m about as far from cool as anyone could possibly get. And I’m ok with that. I actually embrace my lack of coolness. It’s a big part of making me the person that I am.
Except there was just one moment when I did question my lack of coolness. One time when I began to wonder – could it possibly be? Is there a slim chance that I actually might be cool?
It was a long time ago. Well over twenty years now. It all began with an article in a local newspaper listing the five coolest venues in town (at least I think it was five – it was a long time ago). I had to look twice to take in what this article was telling me. I had to blink to make sure I was reading it correctly.
Because, of the five venues listed, I had been to three of them (again, I think it was three) in the last week. That’s right. Uncool little me frequenting three of the five coolest venues in town over a period of several days. I can remember the three, even now:
1. The Esplanade hotel (The Espy, to those in the know). I think I’d gone to catch up with some friends from work. Back in the day, I did find myself there, now and then, mainly to see bands.
2. The Continental Cafe (The Conti – long gone and long lamented). I must have been there to see a band. Can’t remember which one.
3. The Lounge. This was one I didn’t get to very often. Again, it must have been a band. Think it was some kind of jazz-rap fusion thing.
As for the remaining two venues, I have no recollection of what they were. Obviously beyond my meagre state of coolness.
But what did this mean? Had I somehow transcended my uncoolness and graduated into a new state of coolness? What was I going to do to make the most of my amazing new hipster status?
Very little, as it turned out. I quickly reverted back to my usual state of uncoolness. And there I’ve remained as the years have passed. But every so often, it’s nice to look back and reminisce about that special little moment when, for the blink of an eye, I was (allegedly) cool.
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